C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
