they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
