I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
