He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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