Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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