Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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