Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Randomize