Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
