Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
