oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
