well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
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