I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
