I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I have aggressive nipples.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize