I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Your mouth is God's brothel.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
