You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Randomize