I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
