Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
