she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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