come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Randomize
