Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
