i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize