Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
When did angry sex become our thing?
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
