escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
