do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
