the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
