woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
