You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
hell yes lets make some ravioli
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
