I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
