You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
dude. I can hear the air.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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