Your dad touched me again.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
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