I accidentally had phone sex last night
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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