Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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