he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize