your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Randomize
