First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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