A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
