can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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