my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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