wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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