I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
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