GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Randomize
