Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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