girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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