why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
he just fucked me for my cheese..
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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