she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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