He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Randomize
