i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Too much gin, very little bucket
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Randomize
