HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
This house was built for laser tag.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
God I need to hump something, right now.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
