so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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