shes about as inviting as chlamydia
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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